THERESA O'ROURKE
How to Seek Pleasure in Public Places
You and your guy have mastered the Kama Sutra and could inspire a season's worth of Sex and the City mattress scenes. How else can you expand your erotic repertoire? Think outside the bedroom. Whether it's an alfresco fling on your balcony or some action on an airplane, exploring a bit of exhibitionism could be in order. "The possibility of getting caught is a huge turn-on," says Bryce Britton, a sex therapist in California. "There's intense excitement in the idea of being a little bad." But before you take the risk, here are the rules of engagement.
Why Taboo Is a Turn-On
Forbidden trysts invite an element of outrageousness that can give your union a boost. "It's about variety, especially in long-term relationships where sex can become routine," notes sex therapist Michael Perry, Ph.D. "So while doing it in a hotel stairwell may not be inherently sexy, the environment is unconventional and very hot."
In fact, a recent study published in the Journal of Neuroscience reveals that parts of the brain associated with pleasure respond more to unexpected treats than to the predictable kind -- and public sex has surprise built right in. So stun your beau by suggesting he cop a feel under the picnic blanket and watch his eyes light up.b
The Law vs. Your Libido
If you decide to indulge in such daredevil dalliances, discretion is advised. The law won't side with your lust, says Richard Posner, a judge and coeditor of A Guide to America's Sex Laws. Every state has statutes against public indecency and nudity. If caught in the act, you can be charged with a misdemeanor, which could mean -- yikes! -- a year in jail.
Case in point: Last spring, a frisky duo in Des Moines was arrested and charged with indecent exposure for knocking boots in their car. Their main mistake? They parked across the street from the courthouse in broad daylight.
A Little Dare Will Do Ya
Going public doesn't have to mean going all the way. Britton's advice is to start small -- sexy but small: "When you're at a restaurant, say something suggestive to him over dinner," she says. "Then take off your shoe and fondle his groin with your foot under the table."
Taking it slow proved satisfying for Veronica*, 26: "One of the hottest scenes of all time is in the movie Fear, when Mark Wahlberg puts his hands between Reese Witherspoon's legs while they're riding a roller coaster," she says. "My boyfriend and I recently visited an amusement park just so we could reenact it. No one knew anything was up, but we got off knowing all those people were so close by."
b
Public-Passion Pointers
If you're ready to graduate from PDA to the naughty whole nine yards, you'll need to pick a position that complements the compromising nature of the act. Public encounters generally don't allow for the luxury of lying down, so variations on standing and seated sex work best. Some options: Lean over a flat surface (like a bathroom sink) and let him take you from behind. Or "climb" your dude -- wrap your legs around him while he holds you up -- in an alley or party coat closet.b
These maneuvers demand that you dress the part. Lisa, 31, wore a flowing skirt and thigh-high stockings the night she "worked late" with her coworker boyfriend. "I sat him on a chair and, facing away from him, lowered myself down," she explains. "If the janitor had walked in, at first glance it would have looked like I was just sitting on his lap." Fortunately, their foray into adventurous amore went undiscovered, and now they really know what it means to mix business with pleasure.
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How to Seek Pleasure in Public Places
You and your guy have mastered the Kama Sutra and could inspire a season's worth of Sex and the City mattress scenes. How else can you expand your erotic repertoire? Think outside the bedroom. Whether it's an alfresco fling on your balcony or some action on an airplane, exploring a bit of exhibitionism could be in order. "The possibility of getting caught is a huge turn-on," says Bryce Britton, a sex therapist in California. "There's intense excitement in the idea of being a little bad." But before you take the risk, here are the rules of engagement.
Why Taboo Is a Turn-On
Forbidden trysts invite an element of outrageousness that can give your union a boost. "It's about variety, especially in long-term relationships where sex can become routine," notes sex therapist Michael Perry, Ph.D. "So while doing it in a hotel stairwell may not be inherently sexy, the environment is unconventional and very hot."
In fact, a recent study published in the Journal of Neuroscience reveals that parts of the brain associated with pleasure respond more to unexpected treats than to the predictable kind -- and public sex has surprise built right in. So stun your beau by suggesting he cop a feel under the picnic blanket and watch his eyes light up.b
The Law vs. Your Libido
If you decide to indulge in such daredevil dalliances, discretion is advised. The law won't side with your lust, says Richard Posner, a judge and coeditor of A Guide to America's Sex Laws. Every state has statutes against public indecency and nudity. If caught in the act, you can be charged with a misdemeanor, which could mean -- yikes! -- a year in jail.
Case in point: Last spring, a frisky duo in Des Moines was arrested and charged with indecent exposure for knocking boots in their car. Their main mistake? They parked across the street from the courthouse in broad daylight.
A Little Dare Will Do Ya
Going public doesn't have to mean going all the way. Britton's advice is to start small -- sexy but small: "When you're at a restaurant, say something suggestive to him over dinner," she says. "Then take off your shoe and fondle his groin with your foot under the table."
Taking it slow proved satisfying for Veronica*, 26: "One of the hottest scenes of all time is in the movie Fear, when Mark Wahlberg puts his hands between Reese Witherspoon's legs while they're riding a roller coaster," she says. "My boyfriend and I recently visited an amusement park just so we could reenact it. No one knew anything was up, but we got off knowing all those people were so close by."
b
Public-Passion Pointers
If you're ready to graduate from PDA to the naughty whole nine yards, you'll need to pick a position that complements the compromising nature of the act. Public encounters generally don't allow for the luxury of lying down, so variations on standing and seated sex work best. Some options: Lean over a flat surface (like a bathroom sink) and let him take you from behind. Or "climb" your dude -- wrap your legs around him while he holds you up -- in an alley or party coat closet.b
These maneuvers demand that you dress the part. Lisa, 31, wore a flowing skirt and thigh-high stockings the night she "worked late" with her coworker boyfriend. "I sat him on a chair and, facing away from him, lowered myself down," she explains. "If the janitor had walked in, at first glance it would have looked like I was just sitting on his lap." Fortunately, their foray into adventurous amore went undiscovered, and now they really know what it means to mix business with pleasure.
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